oh so little

I have done everything in my power to let her go. I dont speak to her. I try my best to avoid the memories, the laughter, the cries everything. I go alternate routes where ever I go to avoid seeing anywhere she might be, but still even after so long of that last kiss, I hear her name and whatever I have accomplished crumbles to nothing. Its so different because I was truly in love for once in my life. Thinking the whole time she was in love with me as well, turned out to be a joke from her end but still I cry myself to sleep. I dont regret ever being with her, ever dating her, kissing her. I am glad I did all the things I have done with her. I just wish and pray I could go back and put my hand to my heart and guard it, I wish I could go back and not fall the way I did, I wish I could go back and not close my eyes when I kissed her. Wish I could go back and just keep my distance and maybe only love her the way she loved me, which was oh so little